


the in between days

by arcadian88



Category: The Wilds (TV 2020)
Genre: Canon complaint in terms of timeline, Gen, missing scenes that are mostly fluff (but not exactly fluffy), rated teen because teenagers swear right?, well they swear in The Wilds
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 18:01:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29318304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arcadian88/pseuds/arcadian88
Summary: Thinking about what might have happened on the days we didn't see
Comments: 4
Kudos: 35





	1. Night of Day Three, early morning of Day Four

“Good acoustics.” Fatin surmised as she dropped her bag on the ground, cocking her head, listening to their voices bouncing off the cave walls.

“Yeah that’s what Shelby and I thought as well.” Dot said, she looked at Shelby who let out a quiet laugh.

Dot was fairly certain she was making the right decision moving them into this cave. Or at least she hoped. Even though it had been established now that the others saw her as their unspoken elected leader, she still felt that it was weird that seven other people trusted her to make good decisions that directly influenced their welfare.

“I feel like a butler.” Toni mutters as she and Dot set down Fatin’s suitcase.

“Thank you ladies.” Fatin said as she opened it up and laid out a sweatshirt to sit on.

“The floor is cold.” Leah complained as she flopped down next to Fatin, kicking a stone to the back of the cave.

“We’ll build a fire.” Shelby encouraged and started setting up twigs and branches. Dot was grateful for Shelby’s occasionally annoying optimism, it kept spirits up and Dot knew from watching Survivor that low morale could be fatal.

The sun was setting and Dot wandered to the mouth of the cave. She took Shelby’s advice and stayed to watch until the green flash blinked across the horizon. Dot watched the sunset with tears streaming down her face not bothering to wipe them away. She missed her dad so much that just thinking about him was still painful. After he had died it was as if her life had died along with him. At that point, other than school, her life had revolved completely around him, it had to in order to meet his needs. She had felt lost even before the island, in that time between when her dad died and the meeting with that Gretchen woman. _Nothing in life is free._ That sentiment echoes in her mind as she flashes back to that conversation. Was his death the price of getting to see a sunset her father wanted her to witness? She wished that they could be watching it together. The light finally faded from the sky and Dot turned and walked back to where the others were settling in for the night.

*

The cave was definitely a good call in terms of keeping warm. Even though they had to build the fire near the mouth of the cave so that they didn’t die of smoke inhalation the rock helped keep the warmth insulated. Kind of, the air was warm, the ground was still cold.

“Is it just me or is this rock harder than the sand?” Rachel asked eagle-spread with a rolled up t-shirt as a pillow under her head.

“At least it’s warmer than the beach.” Martha said shuffling closer to the fire. Toni settled beside her with her arms resting in her knees.

“Hey Shelby, got another icebreaker?” Dot asks across the fire. The last one went pretty well and Dot liked getting to know the others better, also there wasn’t much else to do at the moment.

Shelby was silent for a moment, thinking and then said. “How ‘bout two truths an’ a lie?”

“Isn’t lying like a sin to you?” Toni shoots a raised eyebrow at Shelby.

Dot sighs internally. Toni and Shelby need to figure out whatever shit they have going on and Dot is pretty sure Shelby didn’t just run into a tree. Shelby may be a cliche on multiple levels but she wasn’t clumsy.

“And if we guess the lie you have to drink and if not we drink, the audience gets 2 guesses.” Fatin proclaims digging out the remaining minibar bottles they had put in her suitcase to carry to the cave.

“Who goes first?” Martha asks sitting forward in anticipation, accepting her bottle of gin from Fatin.

“We could spin a bottle?” Nora suggests. All heads turn in her direction. “I mean, just to decide who goes first.” The mini vodka lands on Toni.

“Alright. My favorite color is orange, I can slam dunk and I’ve been to Disneyland.”

“Slam dunk is the lie.” Rachel says confidently.

“Are you even tall enough?” She adds with a raised eyebrow.

“Wrong. My height hasn’t ever stopped me before.”

Rachel takes a sip looking surly.

“You’ve never been to Disneyland?” Shelby queries. It’s Toni’s turn to frown as she takes a drink. “Let me guess princess, you’ve been at least a dozen.”

“Just three, we went each time me and my siblings turned eight.” Toni rolls her eyes.

“In Disney parks you’re never more than 30 feet from a trash can.” Nora says out of the blue.

Dot likes Nora, but the girl definitely has her moments with spouting off strange and only sometimes applicable-to-the-situation facts.

“Go on and spin.” Dot said because Toni was looking like she had some more to say about Shelby’s obvious privilege of taking multiple trips to Disneyland.

Toni’s spin lands on Fatin.

“Excellent.” Fatin says rubbing her hands together. “I’ve partied with Elon Musk. Play the cello. Faked an orgasm.”

“But aren’t all of those true? You play the cello.” Leah says.

Fatin clinks her bottle against Leah’s. “Anyone who breaks the rules, such as outing a truth, must drink.”

“You’ve partied with Elon Musk’s assistant, not the man himself?” Nora guesses.

The girls hoot and holler as Fatin bows low and takes a swig.

“You’re sneaky smart aren’t you.” Fatin smiles looking at Nora.

Nora blinks and then blushes, looking down.

“Ladies, a lesson I’ve learned from all my previous experience is that you are doing yourself a disservice if you fake an orgasm which is why I’ve always been insistent on getting one even if the other party has finished.” Fatin declares spinning the bottle.

The game goes on until everyone’s had their turn which incidentally was good timing as they all finished the last of the plane’s alcohol supply.

*

Dot was pleasantly tipsy and the fire was warm. Fatin was taking the first shift for fire duty. Even though their dinner had been meager Dot felt full. Possibly full of liquid and would probably have to get up and pee later tonight but that was a future-Dot worry. She laid on her back staring up at the ceiling of the cave. She was used to going to sleep to the sound of the TV her dad stayed up watching, night time had always been the hardest for him. A little while later Dot finally feels on the edge of slipping into unconsciousness. Suddenly she felt the air above her face move and something warm and gooey lands in her mouth. The smell of shit filled her nostrils and mouth and she sits up screaming. The fire had gone out leaving the air freezing in the cave and the pitch blackness is overwhelming.

“Fuck! What’s happening?!” Toni said scrambling on the ground beside her. The other girls were panicking as well. Fatin fell over from her seated sleeping position and shrieked.

“Ahhh! Something’s in my hair! Get it out! Get it out!”

“Where the fuck is the lighter?” Rachel barks from the back of the cave.

“It’s here somewhere.” Martha replies. "Got it!"

Finally there was the comforting flicking sound and a single flame illuminated the cave and it became quickly apparent that the air was filled with bats whooshing about making irritated chirps at the sudden light. Leah managed to smack the bat that had gotten caught in Fatin hair out and it zoomed out of the cave. The other girls crouched down and were attempting to protect their hair with hoodies and Rachel’s case yanking her t-shirt up over her head. Meanwhile Dot was vigorously wiping her mouth out with the hem of her t-shirt.

“A bat shit in my mouth.” she gasped out.

Immediately a chorus of “gross!”, “oh my god”, and “disgusting” rose around her. Fatin handed her a can of Coke which Dot immediately popped open and washed her mouth out at the cave’s entrance.

“So I’m thinking no more cave?” Martha ventures and then looks guilty and adds. “I mean it was a good idea to begin with.”

Dot sighs, taking another swig of Coke and spitting. The first rays of morning are peeking over the ocean.

“We’ll move when the sun gets above the horizon. Leah, do you want to take over fire duty?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading my indulgence in this show
> 
> Also if all the girls are supposed to be under 21 (and we're going by the American legal drinking age) why was there even alcohol on the plane?


	2. Day Five

“Look what washed up today.” Shelby sang somewhat enthusiastically. 

Even she was growing tired of the little bags of nuts. They weren’t good for her teeth and she had to spend extra time cleaning her flipper which increased her anxiety about getting caught by one of the other girls. Dot knew and even though she had promised to keep her secret Shelby couldn’t help but occasionally worry when she saw Dot talking to other girls, especially Fatin, that girl was a glutton for gossip. A secret was only a secret if only so many people knew, ideally that number being one however under these current circumstances Shelby supposed things were bound to come out. 

“Great. More nuts.” Rachel said, rolling her eyes. 

“After we get off this island I am never eating another nut again.” Fatin vows. “Unless it’s attached to a really hot dude.” She adds. Dot snickers. 

The corners of Shelby’s mouth quirk upwards until the image of her father’s face flashes in her mind and it turns into a grimace and she looks down. Fatin and her dirty jokes are vaguely amusing but Shelby had been brought up to not find humor in those kinds of jokes. Thankfully no one seemed to have noticed her discomfort. She looks up again and catches Toni looking at her. Sheesh, those chestnut colored eyes with flecks of gold always seemed to be watching her...why was she noticing gold flecks. Shelby banished the thought firmly to the back of her mind. The specifics of someone's eye color was not priority right now. 

“We could try roasting them if we could find something to roast them on.” Nora piped up from behind her notebook. 

“Oh my god, in Bali, they have these amazing roasted peanuts and with a nice cold beer on the beach.” Fatin said wistfully.

“Well you have the beach, just missing the peanuts, the beer and the one percenter life.” Toni pointed out. Fatin flipped her off with a smile. 

“I would kill for a Shake Shack burger.” Leah said thoughtfully.

“Rachel has no idea what any of you are talking about.” Nora supplied. 

“Yes I do.” Rachel snapped back. “I just haven’t eaten at any of those places. Coach said that if you eat crap your performance is going to be crap.” 

“She’s not even your coach anymore. Stop acting like her word is God.” Nora fires back. Rachel raises an eyebrow as if she’s briefly impressed with her sister talking back. Shelby found the twins fascinating. No one in her household would ever be allowed to speak like that to one another. 

“Really?” Dot said, “But fast food is amazing, McDonald’s, In and Out, KFC.” 

“I miss my mom’s fried rice.” Martha said looking longingly at the horizon. 

Shelby was sitting next to Martha, glancing around she saw Toni staring at them with not quite a glare but close to one across the fire. Shelby liked Martha. She was easy to get along with and her positive attitude was incredibly helpful in their increasingly dire situation. What she didn’t understand was how Martha and Toni came to be friends. They were so different just in their baseline personalities. Shelby had never interacted with someone with such a short fuse as Toni. Also whenever Shelby was hanging out with Martha, Toni always seemed to be in her periphery glaring at them for a bit before stomping off in the opposite direction. was quite obvious Toni was very protective of Martha and probably vice versa.

“Hey can I ask you something?” Shelby said, turning her head towards Martha. “How did you and Toni become friends?” 

Still staring out at the horizon Martha answered.

“Sometimes it's like I can’t remember a time when Toni and I didn’t know each other. But in reality we met each other in second grade. On the playground during recess two boys came up and started bullying me for some stupid reason or another. I don’t quite recall what it was about exactly, it was such a long time ago. Anyway Toni saw me being cornered and came up and punched both of them, one in the face and the other in the stomach. Obviously she got detention for that but I waited for her after school until she was out and the rest is history. Toni and I were also one of the few kids from the reservation that went to public school so I think initially we bonded over that.” 

As Shelby listened she was surprised as memories of Becca floated up on the surface of her mind. She and Becca had also met in kindergarten but that was the only similarity. They had become friends because they decided to sit together at lunch and Becca made Shelby laugh. Up until now Shelby had been successful in keeping Becca from her mind. She had avoided it as thinking about her had often resulted in panic attacks leaving her sobbing and emotionally drained, the worst part was that she had no one to talk to about her. The person who Shelby would have gone to talk about Becca would have been Becca. 

Shelby shuffled closer to Martha. On the outside it probably seemed like Shelby was cold and looking for warmth. She looked over at Toni, who caught her gaze and fully glared before getting up and walking down to the water. 

“I’m sorry, she’s just worried about me.” Martha sighed. Her eyes were also on Toni’s retreating figure. 

“Why?” Shelby asked perplexed.

“She thinks you’re just using me and when we get off this island you’re going to ditch me.” 

Shelby opened her mouth to protest but Martha cut her off. 

“I told her that wasn’t true and you weren’t like that.”

“She thinks very little of me.” Shelby commented, staring as Toni dug a holes with her heels in the sand. 

“She’s like that with a lot of people.” Martha says. She pauses for a moment and then continues. 

“I mean, this really isn’t a secret but I imagine she’d be pissed if I told you what I’m about to tell you so mum’s the word okay?”

“Okay.” Shelby says thinking,  _ You’re in luck Martha, it just so happens that I’m very good at keeping secrets. _

“Toni did leave, she wasn’t around for 3rd grade but came back the next year.” Martha continues. 

“I’m not sure what happened to her during that time but when she came back she wasn’t quite the same. Toni would still come over to my house every day after school but whenever it was time for her to go home she would always get angry and upset.” Martha said sadly. 

“I was too young to really realize what was happening but later I figured out that that was when Toni had entered the foster system. Toni told me later that she had been away that previous year because CPS had already gotten wind of her situation and they were threatening to take Toni away. So her mom packed them up and drove them around the country for a year until one night her mom left her at a gas station and never came back. Apparently her mom had gone to a drug den and was going to come back but it was raided by the police and they found Toni still at the gas station and turned her into CPS which brought her back to Minnesota.” 

Shelby just stared at Martha. She had no idea Toni’s growing up had been so horrible.

“I’m telling you this not that it’s an excuse for Toni’s behavior but it’s the reason why she is the way she is sometimes. She’s a really good friend but she has a lot of trust issues when it comes to new people so I wouldn’t take it too personally.” Martha finishes with a small smile. 

“Besides I like being friends with you.”

“I like being friends with you too Martha.” Shelby says smiling back, her thoughts whirling.

*

Shelby was on fire duty, fire reminded her of her father. During hunting season it had been a tradition with her and her father to camp in the woods after the hunt and while he was butchering a part of the buck for dinner she was in charge of the fire. Dammit, she couldn’t escape her past could she. Becca, her dad. Time to think of something else before another thought spiral into a panic attack occurred. Her thoughts drifted to Toni. 

The girl was sleeping on her side, her back to the fire. Her hair that was usually tied up was loose, free. Shelby watched the flickering fire light cast moving shadows in Toni’s loose curls. A memory of Becca shaking her wet curls at her like a dog surfaced in her mind and Shelby winced. There hadn’t been a day that had gone by since her death that Shelby hadn’t thought of her. Laying back and propping herself up on her elbows Shelby looked up at the sky. It was a clear night and the stars were out in all their cosmic glory. She had never seen a sky so beautiful. It had been a tradition when they were younger and their sleepovers had been more frequent, Becca and Shelby used to sneak out on Shelby’s roof to watch the stars and make wishes whenever they saw one shoot across the sky. The stars began to blur and Shelby realized she was crying. Letting out a silent gasp she let the tears fall and opened her eyes wider and blinked rapidly to keep the stars in sight, hoping that wherever Becca was right now she was at peace. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was surprisingly challenging to get into Shelby's head space, hope I did okay...yes I did change the title


	3. Day Eight

Fatin snuggled deeper into her hoodie. Despite the fort’s shelter and the body heat from six other humans, drafts of cold early morning beach air seeps in through the cracks. Only in this specific context, which Fatin decides her imagination could have never conjured, does she wonder if fatter people have an easier time keeping warm. One time she slept with a guy who deemed aquatic wildlife to be acceptable pillow talk, he was a marine biology major so in hindsight that she should have seen it coming. He informed her that blubber was the body fat of whales that they used as insulation when they dive further into the depths of the ocean. To no one's surprise Fatin had no particularly strong opinions on blubber and took that was her cue to leave. 

Reluctantly cracking an eye open she looked around at the sleeping bodies. Shelby was next to her snoring softly, her breath making the strands of hair in her face move slightly. Martha and Toni were curled up back to back. Further up Nora and Rachel were using each other as pillows and Leah was bundled up by the entrance. Predictably Dot was out there stoking the fire and some more boiling water. Fatin pushed herself up and made her way out of the fort. Dot smiled in greeting as Fatin sat down next to her but never took her eyes off the horizon, watching the sunrise. Ever since that day they attempted relocating to that cave Dot had become almost religious about watching the sunrise and sunset. 

“Do you think fatter people have an easier time keeping warm than skinny people?” Fatin asked, prodding the fire with a stick.

Dot glanced at her. “Fuck off.”

“Relax, you’ve got a great ass and tits. And I was trying to think of it in terms of science. Also because I’m always so fucking cold in the mornings.” Fatin grumbled stuffing her hands into her hoodie pockets.

Dot snorted and wrapped her arm around Fatin’s shoulder forcing her to scoot down on the log so she was nestled against Dot’s side.

“I’m always happy to share my fat with you.” 

“Fuck off.” Fatin said but made no attempt to move away. “Can I ask you a question Dorothy?” 

“I swear to god if it’s another fat question...”

“What’s up with you and watching the sunrise and sunset every day? I feel like you’re more committed to it than Shelby is to God. I mean that girl doesn’t even pray before she eats anymore.” 

Dot tries to huffs out a laugh. 

“Ironically Shelby is the one who introduced me to this watching activity. It’s something I never did at home, mostly cause I never had the time to do it, you know, with my dad and all.” She trails off, her eyes clouding over with grief before it’s blinked away. 

She continues almost forcefully. “When my dad signed me up for the retreat he wouldn’t stop going on about the sunsets in Hawaii and how he was psyched for me to see them.” 

“Sorry about your dad.” Fatin murmurs. 

Dot nods in thanks and swallows hard. Fatin keeps her eyes on the sunrise and pretends not to notice when Dot wipes her face with her sleeve. 

“You being sincere is weirding me out.” Dot says after the moment passes. Fatin nudges her knee into Dot’s.

“Yeah I know, me too. I’m going to stop now.” 

“Morning.” Mumbles Leah plopping down and scooting as close to the fire as possible. 

“Hey Leah, sleep well?” Dot passes her a water bottle that had been cooling in the sand. 

“Could have been better.” Leah replies, taking a sip. 

Leah looked like a hot mess, which wasn’t new but the bags under her eyes were. Leah was the last one to leave Jeanette’s grave site. Like a freaky weirdo she sat and stared at the hole in the ground until Dot appointed her first on fire duty forcing her to return to camp. 

“I’m going to grab some more wood.” Dot says getting up. Their wood stock pile was relocated on Nora’s suggestion to the eastern side of the fort where it got the most sun during the day to keep the kindling dry. 

Once Dot was out of earshot Leah leans and whispers. “I want to search for Jeanette’s body.” 

“Terrible idea.” Fatin responds immediately. This was not because it was actually a bad idea but because on principle Fatin felt that Leah’s thought spirals shouldn’t be allowed to progress without some push back, it keeps the crazy in check. 

“Well do you have a reasonable explanation as to where her body might have gone?” Leah demanded. 

Fatin has gotten used to not looking alarmed when Leah turned that intense look on. Admittedly she did not and the tide theory didn’t really hold up because even with the camp being 120 feet away Fatin is fairly certain whomever was watching the fire would have seen a human body being pulled out to sea. After a short internal debate where curiosity won over Fatin turned to Leah.

“Okay, what did you have in mind exactly?”

*

“Fuck me.” Fatin hisses as she trips once again over a tree root. Meanwhile Leah forges ahead, her eyes wide with anticipation. After a meager breakfast of berries and plane nuts the girls discussed plans of how to transport water from the pond to camp. The idea of camping at the pond was immediately shot down when the possibility of mosquitoes was mentioned. Nora had suggested creating some sort of plumbing line to camp and Martha added that she had seen bamboo growing in the forest. Tasks were assigned and that’s how Leah and Fatin ended up in the forest “looking for bamboo” but in reality the minute they got out of earshot of the others Leah announced that they were going to look for Jeanette’s body. That had been the plan all along and Fatin had convinced Leah to wait for when the opportunity arose. To Leah's delight the opportunity was apparently now. 

“What exactly are we looking for?” Fatin called out again.

“Anything that looks suspicious.” Came the most unhelpful reply. 

“Okay...remind me why you’re under the impression we’re even going to find anything if her body was quote on quote taken?” 

“When I got into the hole I saw the sides of the grave had cuts to them, like someone had a shovel. And yeah I know the sand was wet and all so maybe the tide did come in at some point but I’m pretty sure water doesn’t leave patterns like that.” 

“You’re lucky I like you.” Fatin curses as she stumbles over yet another root. She stopped dead in her tracks. "Wait. I'm sorry. Did you just tell me that you voluntarily hopped into an open grave?!" 

*

Fatin stared out at the waves. She and Leah were the last ones to get back to camp and Fatin was exhausted. It took a lot of convincing, mostly Fatin whining about being hungry, but she was able to get Leah to turn around and head back to camp and hit pause on their “Look for a dead body search” which so far had yielded nothing. Not that Fatin was particularly disappointed about, finding a decomposing body in this tropical hellscape wasn’t on her priority list as it seemed to be on Leah’s.

She sipped some water and pulled it away from her mouth, grimacing as she swallowed forcefully. It hadn’t had enough time yet to cool from it’s boil and tasted sickly warm. This is why tea was invented, Fatin thought. Because plain warm water is fucking gross. She got up and walked back to the camp. The others looked as equally exhausted as she felt. None of the bamboo they find is big enough to fashion a drain system with and the pieces they tried ended up splintering with the axe that was now dull. As much as it pained her inside, Fatin realized that they could crack her suitcase in half and use the frame of one to carry water back to camp and offered it up as tribute.

“Wait, where’s Leah?” Fatin asked looking around. Of course Leah was the one that was missing, between her, Nora and Shelby it’s like they all took turns sneaking off to do who knows what that Fatin never found the energy to care enough about to be more nosy.

“Jesus Christ, I swear it’s like herding cats with you all.” Dot complained. 

“Can I interest you in a cashew?” Martha said holding out yet another airplane-sized bag of complimentary mixed nuts that had washed ashore. 

“Thanks Martha.” Dot took some and crunch on them robotically. Eyeing the others suspiciously as if they were all going to scatter at any moment. 

“I’m going to look for her.” Fatin said to both everyone’s surprise and hers. 

“Be back but sundown or else I’ll be leading the SWAT team.” Dot said. Immediately protests of tramping through the forest in the dark went up and Dot gestured at the chaos looking at Fatin. She rolled her eyes and set off. 

*

She found Leah at the edge of the water mindlessly pulling at weeds.

“Didn’t know you were into gardening.” 

Leah blinked down at the tiny massacre she produced at her feet and rubbed her hands on her jeans.

“One of my chores at home was to trim the hedges.” 

“You don’t wax?” Fatin said jokingly. What? It’s a crime in her opinion to actively miss an opportunity for a dirty joke. 

Leah smiles faintly.

“Ha ha, you’re so funny.” 

“Ahh she’s sarcastic as well, we can be friends now.” 

“I’m not crazy.” Leah says firmly.

“I don’t think you are but I think the contradicting evidence weighs out right now.” 

“One of the last things Jeanette said to me was “Sorry. I’m so sorry.” What do you think she was sorry for? God! I don’t know what to do.” Leah said sadly, desperation leaking into her words. 

Fatin blinked. An image of her mother crying on the floor saying those words when she found out about her husband swam to the forefront of her mind. Well she couldn’t do anything about that right now so she wasn’t going to expend mental energy on it and firmly pushed the thought to the back of her brain space. 

“Look Leah, I don’t have an exact reason, maybe it’s because you’re actually an okay person, but I believe you. I do, really.” Fatin said earnestly, putting a hand on Leah's shoulder. God, the island was making her soft. “But please, for your sanity and mine, it’s almost the end of the day and walking around here in the daylight is already a tripping hazard for me and I will mostly certainly kill myself should I attempt it at night. So can we give it a rest for the day and I promise I’ll go along with whatever you want to do tomorrow.”

Leah stared at her for a moment looking slightly confused. 

“You’re being really nice, it’s weird.” 

“Trust me, it’s a newly acquired habit I’m trying to break.” Fatin held out a hand and pulled Leah up. “Let’s get back before Dot gets cranky and gets her cargo pants in a twist.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fatin is my favorite character...mostly because I found her easy to write for this chapter


	4. Day Nine

The only person sneakier than Shelby was Nora, in Nora’s opinion anyway. That’s why Nora had already figured out Shelby’s secret by week two on the island. The phone Nora had been given by Gretchen did have a long signal range but even so it had the best reception if she were up high. It seemed easy enough to sneak off in the beginning. The other girls were quick to label her, as her peers at school did, the quiet one who kept to herself. Nora considers it both a blessing and curse of her natural ability to melt into the background of life and go unnoticed for the most part. She had spotted Shelby walking right under the cliff she was perched on texting an update to HQ. Shelby took a few more steps and then stopped and looked around, Nora observed that people rarely looked up when they were checking if someone was watching them. Using the phone’s camera to zoom in, Nora watched as Shelby pulled out her flipper and swished it in the surf a few times before popping it back in. When Nora got the text that a medical supplies bag was being dropped off, she knew that Shelby was going to be the one to plant it on. Nora simply placed it in the area of the beach where Shelby usually went to practice her dental hygiene. The find was inevitable. Nora didn’t even have to check to make sure she picked it up, part of the front Shelby put on included being helpful to almost a compulsory-level. 

*

One of the past times that Nora develops on the island is following Shelby. Per Gretchen’s orders she’s supposed to be keeping tabs on all the girls but Shelby so far has turned out to be the one hiding the most so far. She tries not to do it too much so as to not attract the attention of the others but that doesn’t seem to be a problem so far. Shelby seems to be lost in her own head on her dental hygiene walks that she hasn’t noticed Nora once. Shelby stops and Nora ducks behind a nearby rock, peering around the corner she watches as Shelby wades out into the surf and drags a piece of the plane’s wing out onto the sand. Shelby stares at it for a moment, probably trying to decide whether to bring it back to camp or not. She’s not sure exactly why she did it but Nora got up from her crouched position and started walking towards her. The squelching of Nora’s shoes on the wet sand makes her presence known and Shelby turns. 

“Hey.” Shelby says in greeting. 

“Hello.” Nora replies with a small smile. “I was just going for a walk, daily exercise is good for physical and mental health and right now the wind isn’t so strong.” 

Over explanation is a classic move for raising suspicion, Nora mentally hits her forehead, luckily it works with her personality and Shelby is none the wiser. 

“Do you want help carrying that back to camp?” Nora gestures to the plane panel glinting in the sun as the water drops dry on it. 

“I was tryin’ to decide if we could actually use it for somethin’ or if it was just going to just be another piece of flotsam.” Shelby digs around in the sand with her big toe. 

“Well, it could be used to reinforce the fort, a drying surface for clothes or maybe even a cooking surface if we find something to eat.” Nora offers. 

“You’re always full of helpful ideas, I like that about you.” Shelby smiles showing her teeth and Nora tries to guess which exact ones are fake. Shelby must have a good orthodontist, the alignment is perfect. 

Nora smiled and teetered for a moment before grabbing an end of the panel. Shelby picked up the other.

“I know the others, well mostly Leah, but I think she’s kinda suspicious of everything nowadays, they think it’s suspicious that I’m the one who often brings back the good finds washed up from the shore but I swear I just happ’n upon ‘em. Like the pilot’s bag. Sorry, I know I’m ramblin’.” 

“I believe you Shelby.” Nora says assuredly. “But nervous rambling combined with the fact that you’re always going off by yourself doesn’t make for a compelling case for the others.” 

“I see your point.” Shelby concedes. The campsite comes into sight and suddenly Shelby stops and drops her end of the panel, jerking Nora to a halt. “You seem like you’re good at keeping secrets.” 

Nora freezes inside for a moment before quickly forming a small smile on her face.

“It’s mostly because I don’t have anyone to tell secrets to really.” 

“Right, well, can I show you something? Promise to not share it with the others?”

“Okay.” Nora raises her eyebrows slightly. She has a very strong guess as to what Shelby is going to reveal. 

Shelby pulls out her teeth and holds them up. Bingo. Knew it. Also she was wrong about which ones were fake. 

“I’ve been sneakin’ off to clean these, I have to do it every time after I eat somethin’.”

“I know it’s probably an important thing to you but in comparison to being stranded on a deserted island it’s really not that big of a deal.” Nora says watching Shelby put her teeth back in.

Shelby laughs. “Yeah, you make a fair point.” 

“I’ll keep your secret.” _Because lord knows I’ve got my own_ , Nora thinks and curves her mouth into a smile. 

The plane panel ends up being used as a makeshift chore chart and Fatin’s nail polish collection was put to great use. At the end of the day all of them were sitting around the fire, nibbling on granola bars. 

“I like having chores here.” Martha says thoughtfully. “I used to find them so annoying at home.” 

“Dishes were my least favorite.” Shelby chimes in. 

“As if you did chores princess.” Toni smirks. 

“I did!” She insisted and then added. “I mean we had a cleaner come once a week for the entire-”

“There it is.” Toni cuts her off. 

“Sometimes I would volunteer to do the dishes after dinner just to put off practicing my cello for a bit.” Fatin says wistfully and then adds, “I mean, really it was just loading the dishwasher but still.”

“Ahh so that’s where your calluses come from.” Dot says looking at Fatin’s hand. 

“Oh my god! I moisturize!” Fatin exclaims, rubbing her fingertip pads and then she grabs Dot’s hands, rubbing her own against them. “Do my hands feel dry to you?” 

*

Nora turned her head and looked around. She watched the rise and fall of each of the girls' breaths, the only indication they were still alive when they were sleeping. After Jeanette her anxiety about someone else dying on the island had increased tenfold. Leah frowned in her sleep and rolled over facing Fatin who shuffled closer, their legs touching. 

The phone buzzed once again in her pocket and Nora desperately grounded it into her side, dulling the vibrations and hoping no one heard the buzz over the swell of the waves crashing on the beach. Enough was enough. She sat up slowly. 

“I’m just going to the bathroom.” Nora whispered across to Shelby who was on fire duty. 

Nora usually sent updates during the day when they were more spread out and it was easier to sneak off. Ideally Nora would have made the excuse off during the change of shift but she had already gotten five text messages from headquarters and it seemed urgent. 

“Okay.” Shelby said unconcernedly. “Careful in the dark, I’ve definitely tripped a few times myself.” 

Nora nodded and turned away. 

*

_HQ: Update_

_HQ: Update now. Anyone else see her body being recovered?_

_HQ: Nora. Update. Now._

_N: No one else saw. Leah is even more suspicious though but is focused on Shelby._

_HQ: Good, keep it that way._

There was a rustling in the bushes and Nora quickly shut off the phone and stuffed it up the sleeve of her hoodie just as Shelby came into view.

“Hey, I got worried an’ came lookin’ for ya.” Shelby whispered. 

“I’m okay.” Nora whispered back. She was pretty sure Shelby hadn’t seen the phone but this was too-close-for-comfort in Nora’s book. “I just got a little turned around. Everything looks a little different in the dark.” 

Shelby nodded and they headed back to camp. 

*

Nora laid back down on her makeshift cushions as Shelby roused Martha for fire duty. Nora looked at them through half-closed eyes. Shelby must have seen the light from the phone’s screen, how else would she have spotted Nora crouched in the bushes? But then why didn’t Shelby say anything? Nora rolls over and stares out at the ocean, moonlight glinting off the now calm dark water. Her phone buzzes one more time and Nora felt like getting up and throwing it in the sea. Carefully she pulls it out and looked at the screen. 

_HQ: Don’t fuck this up._

It was a direct warning, as if Nora needed to be reminded what was at stake for her here. She wondered just how far she would go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay on my third rewatch it finally hit me that Nora legit contemplated killing Leah….I mean she had a fucking folded pillow in her hands, there’s definitely more to her than what we saw in S1.  
> Also maybe someone else (Shelby?) had caught Nora communicating with HQ and could corroborate if Leah ended up telling the other girls about her and that’s what Shelby’s note to Leah “You were right” was in reference to?...just another theory that popped into my head


	5. Day Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: this is Rachel's chapter and mentions her eating disorder

“Nora, for the last time. Would. You. Stop. Burrowing. Into. Me.” Rachel huffs and simultaneously rolls over and shoves Nora away. 

Admittedly it was a bit harder than Rachel intended as Nora slides into Shelby, who knocks into Toni and soon everyone is awake and grumbling. 

“Why?!” Fatin wails and flops down on Leah who’s only opened her eyes and hasn’t moved from the supine position. 

“I think we need some more space.” Nora observes pushing up from the ground. 

“No shit Sherlock.” Toni mumbles, her forehead buried into Martha’s back. 

“Let’s get some water and sustenance in us before we talk about shelter expansion.” Dot says already out on fire duty smirking at the grumbling girls. 

“Too bad there aren’t any more Takis.” Toni says mournfully. 

“For breakfast?” Rachel questions. Toni shrugs in a “sure-why-not” manner.

“You don’t even know the meaning of breakfast.” Nora pipes up as she takes a sip of water before passing it to Leah. 

“Protein shakes count!” Rachel fires back. 

Nora opens her mouth and Dot cuts her off.

“I think we need to extend the fort to improve the quality of sleep.” 

“As if that’s going to happen.” Fatin mutters. 

“Well I fer one wouldn’t mind some more room to stretch my legs out.” Shelby adds and everyone nods their heads in agreement.

“Plus then people can keep their farts more to themselves.” Nora adds. Everyone laughs. 

*

The sun was being its usual relentless self as Rachel felt rivulets of sweat running down her back. They had gone off in pairs looking along the shoreline for more drift wood to extend the lean to. Rachel had been paired off with Martha. Of all the girls Rachel and Martha had interacted the least so far. Martha seemed nice and all but Rachel wasn’t particularly invested in getting to know her. Then again Rachel hadn’t ever really been invested in the whole concept of “making friends”. There had always been seemingly more important things going on in her life like diving, and by extension doing well enough in school to keep diving.

Despite being on a team diving was actually a very individualistic sport. Unless you were doing synchronized diving, which Rachel never did because she didn’t trust the other girls on the team not to fuck up. In the beginning it hadn’t bothered Rachel that much when there were the beginning tell tale signs of her increasing difference in growth between the other girls. She had a growth spurt, her breasts got larger and she even went up half a shoe size. She was still on the team, still diving and nothing seemed amiss. She could still remember it so clearly when Coach sat her down in her office and essentially told her that her diving career was over because she literally grew out of it. She was so angry. Angry at Coach. Angry at the other girls who had “nice compact bodies with seemingly infinite folding capabilities”. Angry at her body for growing. Most of all she was angry at herself for feeling afraid. It was the fear that drove her ultimately to the lengths she went to before the island. The constant exercising, the throwing up, the calorie counting. Her fear that she was nothing if she wasn’t a diver. That her parents would go back to simply passing her over in their eyes. Acting like they didn’t understand her and how she could be so different from her sister. Nora. Nora who caught her in the toilet. Nora who at first seemed to support her but then turned her in to her parents. Nora who found the stupid Dawn of Eve retreat and convinced her parents to let them go this summer. Rachel knew Nora had plans to take more college courses and Rachel herself was planning on...well, after the accident, getting cut from the team and Stanford informing her that her scholarship was being withdrawn, Rachel actually had no plans this summer. Even though she knew Nora wasn’t to blame for the crash it was still her fault that they ended up on the stupid plane in the first place. Rachel laughs bitterly to herself. Wow, very mature of her to blame all her problems on her sister. 

She realized Martha was speaking and pulled her focus to the present. 

“-find too many logs and we end up making a fort castle. Rachel?”

“Hmmm, yeah, sorry, what?” 

“Are you okay? I mean, I know you were just laughing but that didn’t sound exactly like a happy laugh.”

“Um, yeah. I was just thinking about diving. Actually thinking about diving just makes me angry nowadays so I should probably stop doing it.” 

“You know, you’re allowed to feel however you want to feel about it.” 

Rachel shrugs. “It’s stupid though, really, to still be harping about that bullshit since one, it’s in the past and two, it would be more productive to focus on getting off this godforsaken land mass.” She kicks a piece of coral hard and sand goes flying.

“You and Toni are alike.” Martha says picking up a pink seashell. “Except she is externally destructive and yours seems more internal?” 

“You may have a point there.” Rachel admitted grudgingly.

Rachel looks out to the horizon. The sea is calm today, the water looks flat and glass-like, like a swimming pool at five AM, untouched. She flashes back to one of the last conversations she had with her parents before the island. 

_ It was like a cliche out of a movie. She came home from school to find her parents and Nora waiting for her, an intervention. All that was missing was a banner over the mantle saying “INTERVENTION”. Enough was enough, her father began. Her mother kept worrying at her lip until Rachel thought she was going to break skin and Nora acted like she wanted to reach out and hug Rachel but thought better of it, she was right in that moment. _

_ “Look Rachel, I’m sorry but your mom and I are kind of at a loss.” Her father stood up and began pacing.  _

_ “There’s nothing to be at a loss about.” Rachel fired back. _

_ “Rachel, please.” Nora pleaded.  _

_ “Fuck off.” Rachel snapped.  _

_ “Language! Also don’t talk to your sister like that!” Her mother exclaimed, appalled. “I think you ought to be grateful your sister found this wonderful sounding retreat.”  _

_ Both her parents were already looking at her like they didn’t know her. Like they used to look at her before diving. They had already reduced her down to the nobody she had been before. It was already too late.  _

_ “It’s fine mom.” Nora said. Nora was always quick to defend Rachel. It was one of her qualities that annoyed Rachel the most.  _

_ “You are going on this retreat young lady, it’s non-negotiable.” Her father said attempting to sound firm, his voice wavering as if he had never had to speak like this before in his life.  _

_ “You sound weak. You should work on that.” Rachel snarled, getting up and stomping to her bedroom, closing the door with a strong snap. _

“Rachel?” Martha says. She’s standing right in front of her waving her hand.

“Uh, yeah? Shit. Sorry Martha.” Rachel felt guilty, this was the second time she had zoned out with Martha, she was feeling a bit hot. 

“It’s okay, I think the sun may be going to your head a bit. Here, come to the water.” Martha says, wading into the surf.

The water felt nice and cool as it ran over Rachel’s feet. 

“Oh hey look! Shelby is waving us over, I think she found some driftwood.”

*

As much as Rachel had not wanted to build something permanent she admitted that the shelter was a nice escape from the blazing afternoon sun and the cold nights on the beach. Martha and Leah braided together the stringy leaves of a coconut frond which turned out to be pretty good insulation.

“Good find today Shelby.” Dot said appreciatively as she balled up a cardigan to act as a pillow. Leah was in a far corner looking at Shelby suspiciously.

“Hey! That’s Italian cashmere. You fold that properly Dorothy.” Fatin exclaims snatching it from the ground and shaking it out. 

“You seem better today?” Nora asked quietly over Dot and Fatin’s squabbling. 

Rachel shrugged. “I think Martha’s positive attitude is contagious.”

“Yeah I like her. I wish I could be more like her.” Nora murmured looking at Martha who was telling Toni something that was making her smile. 

“You’re perfectly fine the way you are.” Rachel said automatically without really thinking. Nora paused and Rachel could tell she was looking at her. 

“That’s nice of you to say Rachel.” 

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s not get all emotional about it.” Rachel pulled off her sweatshirt and folded it in half. “Here’s a pillow for us.” She ignored the happy smile on Nora’s face as she laid down. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My guess is that Nora is alive but she hasn't been seen on the island since the shark attack and the others think she dead


	6. Day Eleven

Leah awoke to the sound of crashing waves. She had always been one to wake up early but was often reluctant to start the day until hours later. The sound wasn’t as jarring as it had been the first few days on the island though, now it was almost comforting. Judging by the sky it might be one of those rare overcast days which probably meant rain later. Leah performed a whole-body shiver and pulled her cardigan around her more tightly. She wasn’t going to miss the cold mornings, the constant sunburn or the stress of being on a deserted island. She was going to miss waking up outside though. The thought of waking up in an enclosed space with no sky above her head now seemed unimaginable. Jeff had taken her overnight camping one time and they had ended up falling asleep stargazing which at the time Leah had thought was the most romantic thing she had ever done. That memory remained in the categories of “stupid” and “sad” in Leah’s mind. Lost in thought she hadn’t noticed Rachel had returned from an early morning dip in the ocean. Like Leah, Rachel was a naturally early riser and Leah had rolled over watching her wade in before dozing off again. 

“Anyone else wonder if they’re ever going to get all the sand out of their nether regions after this?” Rachel says bluntly as she comes back from a morning dip in the ocean, drying off with a “towel t-shirt”. Leah doesn’t understand anyone who wakes up and the first thing they want to do is go for a swim but to each their own. 

“I gave up.” Toni said star-fishing out beside Martha who’s trying (in vain at this point) to finger comb her hair. 

“Maybe we could try finding some moss as fort bedding.” Nora suggests. 

It was getting almost annoying to a point, how Nora seemed to be a never ending fountain of useful facts and good ideas. Granted, maybe it was because Leah rarely felt helpful or had thoughts that weren’t about Jeff still or her suspicions of the island. 

“It would make the ground more comfy!” Martha said dreamily using a stick to roll a water bottle back into the fire to boil. 

“Might help with insulation.” Dot said thoughtfully. “Okay, how about we pair off and do the “divide and conquer” thing.” 

“Dibs on cargo shorts.” Fatin says immediately. Leah is surprised to feel a wave of disappointment pass through her, she didn’t know she had been hoping Fatin would have wanted to pair up with her. But then again life wasn’t fair and sometimes you weren’t a person’s first choice. That’s what Jeff used to say about her _“You weren’t my first choice but my best unexpected one.”_ Leah wondered when her thought roads wouldn't lead back to Jeff. It was becoming a little exhausting to think about him nowadays.

“Nora you’re with me.” Rachel claimed and Nora nodded not looking up from her writing in her journal.”

“Do you want to be buddies Shelby?” Martha asked which Shelby returned with an enthusiastic “Yeah!”

Leah noticed Toni looking sourly at both of them and then she realized that they were the only two left which meant…

“Leah and Toni, you guys okay pairing up?” Dot said surveying them as the others were getting to their feet. They looked at each other and Toni shrugged before going to grab a water bottle. 

* 

Leah and Toni walk along in silence. Had they been at school Toni and Leah probably wouldn’t have been friends and barely knew the other existed. It was more that they probably wouldn’t have run in the same social circles at all. Actually come to think of it Leah couldn’t really think of a single truly athletic person at her school. Then again her school was filled with privileged kids with an aptitude for fine arts. Feeling like she need to make conversation, Leah said the first thing that came to mind when she thought about Toni. Now Leah wasn’t usually this bold but given these unprecedented times it seemed her filter had completely abandoned her. 

“Do you think Shelby has something to do with how we got here?” 

Toni shot her a quizzical look but shrugged and replied. “I think Shelby is hiding some shit but I don’t think it’s anything to do with the island.”

“Maybe.” Leah was unconvinced. Shelby was the most suspicious one out of all of them still. Leah wanted to figure out where she kept sneaking off to all the time. 

“Okay my turn. Why did you burn your entire book? Aren’t rom-coms teach you that you’re supposed to tip out the pages one by one while flashing through those memories they’re associated with and then feel a cathartic release borderline orgasmic when you’re done?” Toni grabbed a nearby leaf off a branch and began absent-mindedly shredding it.

“Did Martha tell you about the notes written in the margins?” 

“No, she just said you were in love.” Toni said as she sat down on a rock, Leah joined her.

Leah paused and took the leaf from Toni and began shredding it herself. 

“I wasn't in love. I thought I was. But I think it was more that it was obsession masquerading as _"being in love"._ Have you ever been so infatuated with someone they feel like they’re your whole world and when they go away it’s like you’ve been displaced? Like literally they’re the sun, no. They’re gravity, they’re the literal magnetic force that keeps you on your own path and then suddenly they’re gone and you’re just tumbling through life, directionless?” 

“I mean...no?” Toni said and then after a beat continued. “I’ve been in love I guess you could say, but probably my lack of optimism keeps me from feeling that kind of feeling you’re describing? I don’t know. Sometimes I think I’m just not built to last.” 

“Is anyone?” Leah says to the plant pulp in her hands. “How do you stand it?” Leah wasn’t really sure exactly what she was asking but Toni seemed to understand and nodded knowingly. 

“Life is full of shit moments but sometimes you gotta remember to focus and be present on the good ones that come along so you can remember them when the shit comes around again.” 

“That’s a pretty good outlook on life actually.” Leah said thoughtfully. 

“I think I actually got that from one of Marty’s lame insta-quotes she’s always sharing with me.” Toni stands up and offers Leah a hand. 

“Come on, let’s gather the moss that’s been soaking into our asses and get back to the others.” 

“How much you wanna bet the others are already back?”

*

As predicted when they get back the others are already there and they are not drying out moss. Leah and Toni throw their contribution on the pile and head down to the beach where the others are crowded around something. It turns out they are burying Dot who has the most excited expression on her face Leah has seen to date. Dot spots them and shouts. 

“Guys! Look! I’m getting buried in the sand! For the first time!”

The utter delight on Dot’s face was so infectious that Toni barked out a laugh and Leah felt her mouth pull into a grin. As she helps pile sand on Dot’s arm Leah thinks that this is one of the good moments that’s worth remembering.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mimicking the show Leah will have 2 chapters from her POV just fyi


End file.
